I Need a Laugh. Tell me a Joke. Keep em PC.

[Spekulatius]

For German Speakers but this parody account shows promise:

 

[EgonKuhn]

That's hilarious.

It totally brings back childhood memories.

 

Getreu dem Motto: "Den Sozialismus in seinem Lauf hält weder Ochs noch Esel auf!"

 

Or in english: True to the motto: "Neither ox nor ass can stop socialism in its tracks!"

[John Hjorth]

8 minutes ago, EgonKuhn said:

That's hilarious.

It totally brings back childhood memories.

 

Getreu dem Motto: "Den Sozialismus in seinem Lauf hält weder Ochs noch Esel auf!"

 

Or in english: True to the motto: "Neither ox nor ass can stop socialism in its tracks!"

 

Egon [ @EgonKuhn ]

 

Shoulden't 'ass' instead be 'donkey' ? - LoLz! 

 

<John, the Danish and, at times, very bugging nitpicker!>

[EgonKuhn]

1 minute ago, John Hjorth said:

 

Egon [ @EgonKuhn ]

 

Shoulden't 'ass' instead be 'donkey' ? - LoLz! 

 

<John, the Danish and, at times, very bugging nitpicker!>

You're absolutely right, but then it wouldn't rhyme so nicely

[John Hjorth]

1 minute ago, EgonKuhn said:

You're absolutely right, but then it wouldn't rhyme so nicely

 

HaHa!, Egon [ @EgonKuhn ], Sure, but ... 

[EgonKuhn]

2 minutes ago, John Hjorth said:

 

HaHa!, Egon [ @EgonKuhn ], Sure, but ... 

Erich Honecker said this quote some weeks before socialism imploded from the inside in the GDR. Regime change can happen if stars align, seen it with my own eyes.

[John Hjorth]

1 minute ago, EgonKuhn said:

Erich Honecker said this quote some weeks before socialism imploded from the inside in the GDR. Regime change can happen if stars align, seen it with my own eyes.

 

Thank you for putting it in perspective, here, Egon [ @EgonKuhn ].

[Spekulatius]

37 minutes ago, EgonKuhn said:

That's hilarious.

It totally brings back childhood memories.

 

Getreu dem Motto: "Den Sozialismus in seinem Lauf hält weder Ochs noch Esel auf!"

 

Or in english: True to the motto: "Neither ox nor ass can stop socialism in its tracks!"

If you know , you know.

[DooDiligence]

[Spekulatius]

British humor at his best:

 

[formthirteen]

4 hours ago, Spekulatius said:

British humor at his best:

 

 Is it humor though, or just facts?

[John Hjorth]

Elon in Friday mood on Thursday :

 

 

 

[Spekulatius]

On 4/2/2026 at 10:55 AM, BG2008 said:

 

The funny thing is that I couldn't remember the specific metalurgical properties, I know whether it is carbon steele and needs the knife oil so it won't rust 

 

I remember some characteristics of trade off between sharpness and brittleness. Apparently, you're not supposed to put them through the dish washer as it destroys the better knives. I have a knive block full of Henkels that I have used for 15 years now. Got them as wedding gifts from my father in law. Sharpen them with Japanese stones and they are about 90% as good as new. Sharpening knives can feel very therapeautic. 

I see some knife snops here.

 

Most people only need 2 knives for cooking - an 8” full-size and a 4” compact kitchen knife. . It does 95% of what you need to do (and my wife does quite a bit of cooking).

 

We have a better Wüsthoff 8”  Samtuko style knife, a cheap Imarku (Amazon, $19 bought 8 years ago) and two smaller 4” knives.

I also bought an over Prices serrated Cutco knife (great for slicing through frozen stuff) that we bought from the cute girl from our neighbor that was just too good at selling it.

 

Anyways, these butcher block knife sets are overkill for almost everyone an a 4” and 8” knife can get you through your entire life as a hobby cook and I die on this hill.

[EgonKuhn]

Perhaps one argument for having more than two knives is that one is too lazy to wash them after use

[John Hjorth]

German to German!  - Hands on, and all that! 

[DooDiligence]

[DooDiligence]

[BG2008]

On 4/12/2026 at 9:55 AM, Spekulatius said:

I see some knife snops here.

 

Most people only need 2 knives for cooking - an 8” full-size and a 4” compact kitchen knife. . It does 95% of what you need to do (and my wife does quite a bit of cooking).

 

We have a better Wüsthoff 8”  Samtuko style knife, a cheap Imarku (Amazon, $19 bought 8 years ago) and two smaller 4” knives.

I also bought an over Prices serrated Cutco knife (great for slicing through frozen stuff) that we bought from the cute girl from our neighbor that was just too good at selling it.

 

Anyways, these butcher block knife sets are overkill for almost everyone an a 4” and 8” knife can get you through your entire life as a hobby cook and I die on this hill.

 

I will die on this hill and just say that you need the whole knife block. You also need bone picking tweezer for fish, you need 4-5 silicone spatulas for eggs, a fish spatula, a Kitchenaid mixer for making fresh pasta and cookies with your kids, 

 

4-5 cutting boards. 2 smaller ones, 1 large red one for cutting meat, 1 large white one for cutting lots of veggies, and 1 artisanal Ginko wood one for those sushi cuts 

 

You need 2 sets of measuring cups, extra sets of chopsticks, knives, forks, you need sieves, fine ones, coarse ones, and the finest ones, you need sharpening stones, you need cast iron skillet, 1 that is polished and hope that one day the carbon deposits gets so fine, it essentially works like teflon, you need one more that's coarse for cooking meat and can be abused like the cheap Lodge that you buy from Walmart, you need an airfryer, ideally one by SharnkNinja. You absolutely need an InstantPot. You need parchment paper for roasting sweet potatoes so that the clean up is easier, you need 

 

I'm surprised my wife hasn't asked me to throw out my kitchen stuff 

[John Hjorth]

1 hour ago, BG2008 said:

I will die on this hill and just say that you need the whole knife block. You also need bone picking tweezer for fish, you need 4-5 silicone spatulas for eggs, a fish spatula, a Kitchenaid mixer for making fresh pasta and cookies with your kids, 

 

4-5 cutting boards. 2 smaller ones, 1 large red one for cutting meat, 1 large white one for cutting lots of veggies, and 1 artisanal Ginko wood one for those sushi cuts 

 

You need 2 sets of measuring cups, extra sets of chopsticks, knives, forks, you need sieves, fine ones, coarse ones, and the finest ones, you need sharpening stones, you need cast iron skillet, 1 that is polished and hope that one day the carbon deposits gets so fine, it essentially works like teflon, you need one more that's coarse for cooking meat and can be abused like the cheap Lodge that you buy from Walmart, you need an airfryer, ideally one by SharnkNinja. You absolutely need an InstantPot. You need parchment paper for roasting sweet potatoes so that the clean up is easier, you need 

 

I'm surprised my wife hasn't asked me to throw out my kitchen stuff 

 

I really enjoy reading this stuff from you, @BG2008. 

 

It's in your blood. You're a pro in that regard, too. I certainly haven't forgotten what you've told and shared here on CofB&F about your own life.

 

This one cracked me up :

 

1 hour ago, BG2008 said:

... I'm surprised my wife hasn't asked me to throw out my kitchen stuff 

 

[gfp]

https://www.cnbc.com/2026/04/15/allbirds-bird-stock-shoes-ai.html

[John Hjorth]

18 minutes ago, gfp said:

https://www.cnbc.com/2026/04/15/allbirds-bird-stock-shoes-ai.html

 

@gfp,

 

That one is cracking me up, too! 

[cubsfan]

28 minutes ago, John Hjorth said:

 

@gfp,

 

That one is cracking me up, too! 

 

Hilarious

 

[John Hjorth]

Just a follow up on this post :

 

 

Especially the last sentence [  ] :

 

Quote

... So, I'm not totally sure, but I think she said : 'My vagina is not a vase.'

 

Christ!, - It took me ages to get out of trouble, because the vase she wanted was sold out!, and then I had to get the flowers delivered after that! So finally, on Tuesday this week : [  ] :

 

 

- - - o 0 o - - -

 

-She is happy for them! -Maybe I get lucky! 

[Parsad]

56 minutes ago, John Hjorth said:

Just a follow up on this post :

 

 

Especially the last sentence [  ] :

 

 

Christ!, - It took me ages to get out of trouble, because the vase she wanted was sold out!, and then I had to get the flowers delivered after that! So finally, on Tuesday this week : [  ] :

 

 

- - - o 0 o - - -

 

-She is happy for them! -Maybe I get lucky! 

 

Nice recovery!  How can you not get lucky after that!    Cheers!

[ourkid8]

10 hours ago, Parsad said:

 

Nice recovery!  How can you not get lucky after that!    Cheers!

That’s a lock! Hahahah