I Need a Laugh. Tell me a Joke. Keep em PC.

[John Hjorth]

On 4/18/2026 at 5:43 AM, Parsad said:

Nice recovery!  How can you not get lucky after that!    Cheers!

 

On 4/18/2026 at 4:04 PM, ourkid8 said:

That’s a lock! Hahahah

 

Screw it! - I need to get on top of things again <<-literally!>, so I ordered one more! 

 

 

 

 

[DooDiligence]

 

https://theonion.com/oil-prices-plummet-in-big-fuck-you-to-americans-who-got-gas-yesterday/

[John Hjorth]

I got a good chuckle [] out of this one this morning, today, after a row of shitty days [, all details of that left out here]  :

 

 

[John Hjorth]

I got an email from Loudmouth today, as an European citizen, it gave me a good laugh - It can hardly get more 'American' than this.., - me thinking : 'JOE Land?!'

 

[Parsad]

The other side of the correspondent's dinner that was missed!  Cheers!

 

 

[UK]

 

[DooDiligence]

6 hours ago, UK said:

 

 

I can't believe Sorkin didn't roast the fuck out of this douchebag. Becky Quick stepped up (kinda). He must've thought this was fox and he was gonna get glazed by maria bartaromo.

[Parsad]

40 minutes ago, DooDiligence said:

 

I can't believe Sorkin didn't roast the fuck out of this douchebag. Becky Quick stepped up (kinda). He must've thought this was fox and he was gonna get glazed by maria bartaromo.

 

Why is this so hard for you guys?  Is it because you don't like leather jackets?

 

Why can't he issue 500%, 600% stock?  He said he was going to do something crazy a few months ago and buy something totally game-changing...unbelievable...and now it's obvious what he was trying to do!

 

Gamestop plus Ebay...Amazon killer!  I just don't understand how you guys can't see the vision here.  Cheers!

[cubsfan]

On 4/29/2026 at 12:49 PM, Parsad said:

The other side of the correspondent's dinner that was missed!  Cheers!

 

 

 

That is frickin' hilarious!

 

"Hey look, it's Jeanine Piro - this must be the Black Tie event for Jan 6ers!"

 

Edited May 4 by cubsfan

[gfp]

Honestly that interview was pretty embarrassing for Sorkin and Becky.  They can count to $29 billion of cash.  He is proposing half cash, half stock.  So $29 billion of stock issuance gets you to $58 Billion.  His opening offer is less than that.

 

Sorkin and Becky must not understand that stock issuance isn't limited to your current market cap?  Obviously GME would have to increase authorized shares but that isn't some mystic magic trick.

Edited May 4 by gfp

[Parsad]

1 hour ago, gfp said:

Honestly that interview was pretty embarrassing for Sorkin and Becky.  They can count to $29 billion of cash.  He is proposing half cash, half stock.  So $29 billion of stock issuance gets you to $58 Billion.  His opening offer is less than that.

 

Sorkin and Becky must not understand that stock issuance isn't limited to your current market cap?  Obviously GME would have to increase authorized shares but that isn't some mystic magic trick.

 

I think their point was that if he issues that much stock, he's going to dilute the hell out of the company and take on a huge amount of debt.  Also, the assumption is that Ebay shareholders will approve the deal for essentially paper in a company worth a lot less carrying $20B in additional debt.  As he said..."we'll see!"  Cheers!

[DooDiligence]

Buyers who make unsolicited lowball offers on eBay be like

[backtothebeach]

Jony Ive: “Everything is founded on being functional."

(found on reddit)

[brobro777]

Shorting something just to have that immediately squeeze on you 10 points! 
 

Great punchline, absolutely hilarious! 
 

[boilermaker75]

[BG2008]

On 4/13/2026 at 11:37 AM, BG2008 said:

 

I will die on this hill and just say that you need the whole knife block. You also need bone picking tweezer for fish, you need 4-5 silicone spatulas for eggs, a fish spatula, a Kitchenaid mixer for making fresh pasta and cookies with your kids, 

 

4-5 cutting boards. 2 smaller ones, 1 large red one for cutting meat, 1 large white one for cutting lots of veggies, and 1 artisanal Ginko wood one for those sushi cuts 

 

You need 2 sets of measuring cups, extra sets of chopsticks, knives, forks, you need sieves, fine ones, coarse ones, and the finest ones, you need sharpening stones, you need cast iron skillet, 1 that is polished and hope that one day the carbon deposits gets so fine, it essentially works like teflon, you need one more that's coarse for cooking meat and can be abused like the cheap Lodge that you buy from Walmart, you need an airfryer, ideally one by SharnkNinja. You absolutely need an InstantPot. You need parchment paper for roasting sweet potatoes so that the clean up is easier, you need 

 

I'm surprised my wife hasn't asked me to throw out my kitchen stuff 

 

@John Hjorth These memos are for you 

 

Wrote 2 memos on my Substack about "Keeping an Edge" a metaphor for constantly having to work on keeping an investment edge and also needing to sharpen your knives 

 

https://hardassetmemo.substack.com/p/keeping-an-edge

 

Second memo is on PJ-Flying Marketing Gurus and Japanese Ramen Chefs

 

https://hardassetmemo.substack.com/p/pj-flying-marketing-gurus-and-japanese

 

 

 

 

[Spekulatius]

https://babylonbee.com/news/oh-no-trump-negotiates-deal-with-england-and-now-they-have-the-colonies-back

Edited 1 hour ago by Spekulatius